It is delightful each time someone stops and asks how Eric is doing. I ran into Christine, who was his buddy at Jose Rios Middle School. She and Kinny were incredibly insightful and helpful with Eric. They guided and protected him. They liked being with him. Kinny relocated with his family to Seattle. Christy remains in Guam working hard.
Both would have made excellent teachers.
Eric turned 32 in June. The journey continues to teach me much about life, particularly a life not prepared for. Diagnosed with autism, bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, our life is a rollercoaster ride.
As the AOLG Class of 1974 celebrates its 50th reunion, many ladies asked about Eric. At one point, sitting with three classmates, they shared their stories about grandsons who are on the spectrum and another who has a friend with a child on the spectrum.
According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, one out of every 36 children is identified as autistic. One in 45 adults is autistic. We live long.
As there is no manual for parenting, there is no manual for this life. It helps to always remember that, like everything else, a focus on the positives, faith in goodness and the effort to understand helps. And take one day at a time. Sometimes, one minute at a time.
Eric began as a speaker and then, around age two, became non-verbal. During his elementary school years, with speech therapy and huge dosages of literacy development – reading books, watching videos with subtitles, singing songs – his speech returned. Continuous prayers helped me cope and helped with patience.
Technology can be a real friend. Eric connects with technology without explanation. As it is one of my weakest skills, it is with relief that he knows what to do. You need, though, a reliable, quick internet connection.
At the beginning, when diagnosed with a disability, families can request an iPad.
Include it in your Individualized Education Plan. The public school system receives federal dollars for such accommodations.
Today, Eric is 6’2” tall and weighs 292. Big guy. Loves being a forestry aide. We are blessed to have a job coach who enjoys weeding, raking, planting, watering, flushing the area. Lane has been with us for over a decade. When it’s raining and Eric is weeding in the rain, she’s right next to him weeding. Lane knows how to keep a calm atmosphere, and when emotions spiral, she knows what to do.
Eric may be gluten-intolerant. Tests will be done to find out. Our latest challenge is that he has switched his sleeping patterns – day for night and night for day. Apparently, his brain is sending him messages to wake up. Dr. Bellis received approval for a prescription drug that should help. Then, we hope to take him off some medication. He’s on a lot.
But he needs it to help curb his aggressive behavior. Following his rules is a reminder if he wants to stay at home with his mom. Or else, he returns to Guam Behavioral Wellness. We have admitted him three or four times. My mom was livid with me, but he needed to learn that there are consequences for hitting and breaking things.
We are better. I have put the brakes on wishing for a different type of normalcy. This is what we were handed. This is what many, many families are handed.
Eric starts his day with EWTN. I start my day with mass at St. Anthony’s.
So, when I hear people complaining about different things, I close my eyes. Sometimes, I don’t think they realize how fortunate they are to be able to go out to dinner or travel without worrying about behavior. They can simply roll over and sleep when the power goes out.
We are blessed in so many ways. Just having the AOLG ladies ask about him and wish him well touches my heart. God bless each family on this particular journey.
Aline Yamashita is a mom, a teacher and former senator. She served in the 31st and 32nd Guam Legislatures. Send feedback to aline4families@gmail.com.
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